About James H Burns
Since 1977 Jim Burns has been working with students who have learning disabilities and behavioral problems. He has almost 40 years of experience working as an administrator, teacher, college instructor, and seminar leader. He is committed to helping administrators, parents, and teachers establish standards of excellence and help them build successful relationships with their staff, students, and children. He has written and designed The Bully Proof Classroom, a graduate course that is now offered at The College of New Jersey, and La Salle University in Pennsylvania in partnership with The Regional Training Center. This course has been endorsed by the NJEA. He has also written “Anti Bullying 101.” A book that provides teachers, administrators, support staff and parent’s 101 tips on how to achieve permanent help in dealing with unruly behavior and can be used as part of any anti-bullying program. In May of 2015 Jim was awarded the degree of Doctor of Humane Letters by Gratz College in recognition of his almost forty years of work in student behavior management and anti bullying. He is available for on sight in-services and keynotes.
Self-Control, There Is "Nun" Better
Going to a Catholic Grammar School for 9 years had its benefits. We had to wear
uniforms so there wasn't any clothes competition, we went to church all the time so we got some
formal spiritual training, you couldn't even think of using profanity because you thought the
nuns read your mind and would find out what you were thinking, we learned good penmanship,
we were respectful, compliant, and responsible. The crazy thing is no one gave me a choice in
any of these areas I was forced to do them. It wasn't like the nun said to me you can go to church
if you like, or why don't you try to hold your pencil this way, or is that the way to speak to
someone? If I didn't do it the way it was supposed to be done there would be blood stains on the
floor, and it wasn't Jesus' it was mine. As I look back at this experience the one thing that I
realize is that this type of education taught me something that no one talks about today and that's
self-control. The majority of the problems that a person faces in their life are related to a lack of
self-control. Everybody either eats too much, drinks too much, spends too much, can't control
their temper, lusts after things that they can't have like someone else's spouse, and develops
habits that they can't break that could kill them or someone else like smoking or driving too fast.
Now why does this stuff happen? Well I never remember my parents or any teacher in
my life saying to me the choice is yours you can smoke or not, or you can lose your temper or
not, or you can overeat or not. Self-control is taught. If I did something that exhibited a lack of
self-control I got grabbed by someone and got reamed out or in the worst case scenario got
clobbered. I was taught to wait on line, raise my hand, take my time, practice until I got it right,
memorize, and I got drilled on skills that everyone knew were necessary for life long success.
Look musicians practice endless hours to perform a single piece of music. Students study instead
of watch TV. Athletes devote years of their lives to prepare for an Olympic event that may last
only a few minutes.
The concepts of self-control, delayed gratification and discipline seem so counter to our
cultural values. We use our credit cards because we want things right away. We become
impatient if we wait more than a few moments at a drive-through at McDonalds. We eat
ourselves into obesity and poor health because it feels good, with little consideration of the long-
term consequences. Self-control should be graded in school and looked at as a quality necessary
for success as an adult. If you or someone you know is having trouble with self-control I have a
good friend named Sister Houlihan who still thinks self-control is important. She is 4 feet 8
inches tall and she can still make a grown man hold his pencil the right way.
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